Really drunk Aussie driver

Saw this on the news today.

CANBERRA (Reuters) - A drunk driver just 100 yards from Australia's iconic giant monolith once known as Ayers Rock stopped police to ask the way to the 1,100-foot-high rock.

The headlights of the man's car were actually shining on Uluru, which has a 5.8-mile circumference, Northern Territory police said.

The 44-year-old man, whose car was also towing an aluminum boat, has been charged with drunk driving and unlicensed driving.

What makes it even funnier is that Uluru is the only thing out there. All around it is nothing bit flat, flat, flat destert. And, there are no lakes. What is the boat for?

40 Things You'd love to Say out Loud at Work

Ever have one of those days at work when you just want to stand up and scream? Here is some ammo. Thanks SAS Andrew for the material.

• I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap.
• I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
• How about never? Is never good for you?
• I see you've set aside this special time to publicly humiliate yourself.
• I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.
• Who lit the fuse on your tampon?
• I'm out of my mind at the moment, but feel free to leave a message.
• I don't work here - I'm a consultant.
• It sounds like English, but I don't understand a damn word you're saying.
• Ahhh. I see the stuff-up fairy has visited us again.
• I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.
• You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
• I have plenty of talent and vision - I just don't give a damn.
• I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.
• I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
• Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
• The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
• Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
• What am I? Flypaper for freaks?
• I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
• It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of karma to burn off.
• Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
• And your cry-baby whiny assed opinion would be?
• Do I look like a f-ing people person to you?
• This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
• I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
• Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
• If I throw a stick, will you leave?
• Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
• Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
• Oh, I get it. Like humour. Only different.
• A cubicle is just a padded cell without the door.
• Can I trade this job for what's behind door number 1?
• Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
• Nice perfume, but must you marinate in it?
• Chaos, panic and disorder - my work here is finally done.
• How do I set a laser printer to stun.
• I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.
• I'll try being nicer if you try being smarter.
• Wait a minute - I'm just trying to imagine you with a personality.

San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority - More Answers

"Yo" Maiwandi took the time to answer the remaining questions on my last post about this subject. Here is what he wrote. I've edited it slightly to make it more readable, but have not removed anything.

The SGVTA Contraversy

This is one part of a series of posts about The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority

• Truth is stranger than fiction (03-Mar)
• More on the $1M Ferrari wreck in Malbu (18-Mar)
• The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority Anti_Terrorism Unit (24-Mar)
• The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority Rebuttle (27-Mar)
• San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority - More Answers (29-Mar)

Dear Ron,
I want to reply one last time to your remaining questions, however, after this response I believe there will be nothing left to say, and therefore won't respond to any further questions.

Thank you for taking the time to do this. You have shed light on most every question and concern I had. I truly appreciate it.

As for the "police" website being overblown, I acknowledge the error. That site was put together by a well meaning volunteer who basically grabbed content from other sites, and discussed what we planned to do in the future, rather than what we were at the time. We've well acknowledged that error, said our mia culpas and are now ready to move on.

I see that your website has been taken down. That is good because it was really misleading.

As for your suggestion that we amputate the police department. Whether you call it a "police department," "public safety division," "security department," "safety department" or "niceness services," all transit agencies are required to perform the functions I outlined in my original letter to you. Our board is currently reviewing the name to determine what would sit best with the public, but the functions performed by whatever we end up calling it are mandatory, so the final result will be mostly form over substance.

Sorry. I was not clear. Yes, you do have the responsibility to assure that your equipment, drivers, and procedures, meet all laws and standards. But you gave the impression that your "police" department was there to police the public, not yourselves. Big difference there.

With regard to your question about what the camera monitoring system would do, I will only say that it was going to use existing CDMA technology in conjunction with compression technology that Mr. Eriksson developed for other governments to permit real time streaming of all the cameras on board each bus through one single CDMA connection.

OK... onboard webcams transmitting through a cell phone. Nothing that hasn't been done already.

And yes, Mr. Eriksson was planning to equip this camera system with facial recognition technology, something he has worked on before. Buses provide a uniquely cooperative host for facial recognition because sample faces can be limited to nearly one at a time as passengers are scanned, as opposed to typical facial recognition applications that scan hundreds or thousands at a time within groups of people.

Like I said before, the transport of the raw data to be processed is the easy part. That hard part is doing something with it.

You may believe that the system that Mr. Eriksson proposed to us is already available, but I submit that it would have in fact been revolutionary.

As I said, taking pictures or videos and sending them over a cell phone is nothing magic. A working face recognition system that uses these images is mindblowing.

Simply running the name "Stefan Eriksson" on Google will provide you with a very impressive resume, including previous work for the British, Chinese and Russian governments.

I'm looking. I don't see your Stefan Eriksson doing any such things. Links please! However, I do find links about how he was busted in 1993 for counterfeiting and was sentenced to 10 years in prison. I have read how he was known to be the leader of an organized crime group dubbed "The Uppsala Mafia". I have read the SEC reports for his company, Tiger Telematics Inc. Scary stuff. I read how he was forced to resign in 2005 when his past caught up with him. I've read how they were doing shady deals by paying contracts to other companies the executives owned. And they were paying family and friends large "consulting fees" and themselves lots of toys on the company dime.

I do find information about other Stefan Erikssons. But not yours. I see there is a Stefen Eriksson who works at the Swedish embassy in Moscow. There are others who work for major universities and companies around the world.

Sorry bud.... it seems like his resume is complete fiction.

To answer your question, no we never saw a "working" prototype of the system, but we had no doubt that Mr. Eriksson and his associates could have developed the system if he wanted. Whether he really intended to fulfill his commitments, or just wanted to misrepresent his true role with us is something we'll be wondering about for years to come.

Like I told you before. I think you were being hoodwinked by a con artist. Eriksson seems to have a problem telling the truth.

All of the people involved with SGVTA have donated huge amounts of time and effort for a good cause. Sure we made mistakes, but I doubt any other small charity such as ours has ever been in the public eye and scrutinized as heavily as we were in this instance.

unfortunately it only takes one bad apple to ruin the barrel.

Ron, if someone went through everything you've ever said or done, or spoke to anyone you've ever had an argument with, only to turn around and report it all as fact, I suspect you'd look a lot different than the person you really are. I wish that on no one.

That is an exaggeration. I've only questioned the facts presented on your own web site and news articles.

Now, one last request. I've responded to every single question you've put to me, and I've accepted responsibility for those things I think we did wrong. How about you Ron? Your original posts make allegations that simply weren't true. You jumped to conclusions without the facts, and once I brought the facts to your attention, you shifted the debate to issues beyond the scope of what you originally wrote.

Considering the strange facts that I had to work with, some that you claim are false. What conclusion was I suppose to come to?

Fact, SGVTA has never received ONE penny of taxpayer money, yet you have not apologized for saying we did without knowing the facts.

Sorry. I was given the impression from the statement from Monrovia City Manager Scott Ochoa who said "We warned them that if the police agency operated with them in the city of Monrovia, it would jeopardize their [transit] agreement with us." That gave me the impression that the city was paying for the services. After all, it takes money to pay for the large police department that your web site claimed you had.

Fact, SGVTA has never purchased any weapons whatsoever, yet your original post certainly postulates that it might be our secret reason for creating the police department, yet you have not yet acknowledged that you were wrong.

OK... but I wasn't thinking about you. I was thinking about Eriksson. I wouldn't put it past him to get weapons using your department's credentials.

You did finally try to separate us from Mr. Eriksson in an effort to demonstrate the difference. However, we freely acknowledge having accepted Mr. Eriksson offer to donate his time and efforts.

I suppose you heard what happened to him today? He had his illegally registered Mercedes-Benz SLR impounded because it was reported stolen in the UK, and his wife was busted for driving it without a drivers license. Nothing seems right about this guy. Sorry you got messed up with him. He must be good if your natural BS detectors didn't go off.

There are other misconceptions that you conveyed in your original post, and I certainly understand your skepticism. I do believe that you at least owe us an apology for those areas where you misrepresented the truth, or offered speculation that served to hurt us more.

I appreciate your intellectual analysis, but would at least like to see an apology for those things you said that simply weren't true.

OK. Fair nuff. I apologize for things that turned out not to be true. Thanks for the information.

Good luck to you in the future,

Yosuf "Yo" Maiwandi
San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority

Same to you. I hope you and the SGVTA can put these mistakes behind you.

So there it is... the official story. The SGVTA is a good, honest, and free public service. The SGVTA was taken in by a criminal con artist, Eriksson. And then they were sunk by their own fictional public image as presented by their web site.

You gotta admit. It is one hell of a strange story.

Fatality Cover Up in Cyclone Larry!

It seems there were fatalities in last week's cyclone that slammed into Queensland in northeast Australia. Click here to see what happened!

Note: My apologies to non-Australia readers who don't understand this.

The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority Rebuttle

Sorry about the silence for a few days. I went out of town to visit friends out in the country. More about that later. I got back late last night and found an email from Yosuf "Yo" Maiwandi following up my post last week about the San Gabriel Valley Transit Authorityhttp://ron_larson.blogspot.com/2006/03/san-gabriel-valley-transit-authority_27.html

The SGVTA Contraversy

This is one part of a series of posts about The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority

• Truth is stranger than fiction (03-Mar)
• More on the $1M Ferrari wreck in Malbu (18-Mar)
• The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority Anti_Terrorism Unit (24-Mar)
• The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority Rebuttle (27-Mar)
• San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority - More Answers (29-Mar)

Yo's Side Of The Story
First, the email from Yosuf "Yo" Maiwandi. He is the man behind SGVTA, and he seems to feel that he is the one paying the price for Stefan Eriksson's actions after crashing a million dollar Ferrari in Malibu. It is quite long. I'll comment on the email later in the post.

The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority ("SGVTA") first held discussions with Stefan Eriksson in December of 2005. Mr. Eriksson offered to donate time and equipment to develop a real-time camera monitoring system utilizing CDMA technology designed specifically for SGVTA's fleet. Mr. Eriksson proposed using SGVTA buses to test what could have revolutionized transit security on SGVTA's relatively small transit system. SGVTA submitted a fingerprint background check for Mr. Eriksson through the State of California which disclosed no prior record. Mr. Eriksson ultimately was appointed as a civilian volunteer Deputy Commissioner for a specific task - that of developing the proposed monitoring system.

Transit carriers are required by law to perform certain regulatory enforcement functions, including personnel background investigations, medical examinations, random drug and alcohol testing, daily driver health fitness evaluations, administering field breathalyzer examinations (when appropriate), substance abuse recognition, monitoring driving records for drivers, traffic accident investigations, passenger and vehicle safety inspections and constant supervisory oversight. Local law enforcement cannot be expected to perform regulatory enforcement duties on behalf of transit carriers. Accordingly, California law grants transit carriers the right to maintain public safety and/or police units in order to ensure compliance with all public safety regulations. SGVTA lawfully formed a public safety department that has been properly recognized by all law enforcement credentialing agencies, although not yet certified by California's Commission on Peace Officer Standards and Training ("P.O.S.T.") in which participation is strictly voluntary. [1]

While SGVTA's small transit system has never been specifically targeted for any threat of terrorism, SGVTA believes that all transit carriers should fully embrace the terrorism preparedness recommendations set forth by the Departments of Transportation and Homeland Security. SGVTA's fleet is perfectly situated to facilitate discrete research and development of a camera system such as the one Mr. Eriksson proposed. Counter-terrorism experts have predicted that - as was the case in London, England -- our country's small communities, and their regional transit systems, may well be the next target of those who would do us harm. SGVTA is taking all steps within its means to ensure that its passengers and property remain safe and that SGVTA stands properly prepared for any and all disasters.

The subsequent crash of Mr. Eriksson's Ferrari, while unfortunate, was wholly unrelated to SGVTA, other than Mr. Eriksson's volunteer status at the time. SGVTA has investigated the publicized claim that unknown individuals displaying some sort of badge appeared at the crash scene purporting to be officials of "Homeland Security." SGVTA can account for all of its personnel at the time of the incident, is confident that no one, other than Mr. Eriksson was present from SGVTA, and is certain that no SGVTA badges were involved.

SGVTA has been in communication with the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department and the Department of Homeland Security, and will continue to cooperate fully in any investigation.

Notwithstanding reports to the contrary, SGVTA is and has been headquartered at 4115 East Live Oak Avenue in Arcadia since the end of last year. Homer's Automotive in Monrovia donates personnel, vehicle parts, service and labor, and terminal space to assist SGVTA to meet its mission. Assertions that SGVTA or its public safety department are run out of Homer's Automotive are incorrect.

About SGVTA
The San Gabriel Valley Transit Authority is an independent transit agency created to permit near seamless paratransit service throughout the many small cities that make up the San Gabriel Valley.

SGVTA's responsibilities include operating, maintaining and improving paratransit services. SGVTA also works in conjunction with transit operators in other cities and counties to provide intercity and inter-county paratransit service to major medical facilities in southern California, as well as exploring the potential for expanded service.

SGVTA's vision is to provide a transportation system that allows handicapped, disabled, elderly and needy passengers to go anywhere in the region easily and efficiently.

Ron, SGVTA has/had Memorandums of Understanding with two cities, Monrovia and the City of Sierra Madre. Those MOU's only provide for and understanding that SGVTA will provide FREE transportation, mostly intercity, for residents who don't have transportation to medical facilities outside their city of residence. We provide service to the entire San Gabriel Valley, which consists of more than 25 small cities. No MOU calls for any payment from any city, state or federal agency for our services, and we have never received one dime of taxpayer money whatsoever. We provide service to our community at our cost, with NO fee being charged to the passenger. Even our drivers are forbidden from accepting tips.

So far, SGVTA has received donations of cash mostly from myself. We have also received free tires from a local tire store (Monrovia Tire), enough Magellan GPS Navigation devices to equip each of our vans with audible (speech directions) to assist drivers to find locations for our blind passengers who can't give us physical directions, computer reprogramming for our diesel mini buses to make them more fuel efficient (Gale Banks), a free tank of natural gas from the gas company for our natural gas bus, and numerous free repairs to all our vehicles from my shop (Homer's Automotive).

Because of all the negative press, no one wants to be associated with a service that they think is involved with some controversial charity. Therefore, I am selling my own Harley Davidson to raise enough funds to keep our doors open until people start taking us seriously again. We service hundreds of handicapped, elderly, disabled and needy passengers every month, and ironically our passenger load has increased as a result of the negative press, because people who have no means of transportation to and from their doctor's offices don't care about the negative aspect of the articles, and only care about the service we provide. Unfortunately, at a time when we are the most financially challenged, our passenger load continues to rise.

I hope this helps to set the record straight because I am a local mechanic who set out with some friends to do something good for those who needed it the most, and all this negative press over a volunteer's Ferrari has all but ruined a very real service that many people depend on.

Take care,

Yo

What Is Still Missing
Thank you for the email. I can certainly see how you feel that no good deed goes unpunished. It appears to me that you and your agency have been taken advantage of by a world-class con-artist, Stefan Eriksson. Think of this anology. He is a pool hustler and you walked into a pool hall with cash in your pockets bragging about how good you are. He saw a mark and milked it for all that it was worth. Your mistake? It was playing the game in the first place. You were in over your head and didn't know it.

You have explained how Eriksson got involved with the SGVTA, how he slipped past your screening procedures, and what duties he was commissioned with. You also explained why the SGVTA is allowed to have have a law enforcement arm, and the threats that you feel the SGVTA might face. You have explained the services that the SGVTA provides. You have explained how the SGVTA is funded and operates.

You have explained how Eriksson abused the powers he was granted and that the scope of this abuse was limited to only him.

But you have not explained the why the SGVTA made, what is at best egaggerated, or at worst lies, about what the SGVTA is on the website. If your website indicated what you hoped the SGVTA to become, there was nothing that I could see to indicate that. Did you not know about the web site and public image of the SGVTA that was being presented? Did Eriksson do that? Were you not involved in the production and distribution of public information for the agency?

Which came first? Eriksson and his promises? Or the fake public image and emphasis on terrorism?

The Reality Versus The Image
You have to admit, the emphasis in the public statements from your agency gave me and others the impression that the the SGVTA was far more interested in being a state of the art law-enforcement agency than anything else. Why does a small, free bus service for disabled persons need to lie about the size of the police department and the equipment it had? Why does it talk more about its security than the actual services it provides?

I would think that a web site about your agency would emphisis what your email states. It would have publised the fact that it was run on 100% percent donations and accepted no tax money or user fees. You would think that the contributers to the SGVTA would want public recognition of their generosity, such as Monrovia Tire's contribution. You would think that your web site would invite more merchant and private donations to continue to operate. But it didn't. It didn't say anything like that. Instead it talks about the extensive police department and anti-terrorism unit it has.

The bottom line is, the public face of the SGVTA didn't match the reality that you present here. So I'm still asking, why is that? Do you blame people for being spooked and not wanting anything to do with this anymore? Eriksson does not appear to be at to blame for those inconsistantcies. He was just the reason they came to the attention of people like me.

A Plea From a Client
I also found a long and heartfelt comment to the same post that I want to highlight. This anonymous poster is upset that my speculation about the reasons behind all of this is going to ruin a good thing.

My Father lives in Monrovia a city they service. They pick him up every week and take him to the doctor for his appointment. The bus driver not only helps him on the bus but walks up to his house to help him to the bus. I offered the bus driver $20.00 as a tip and he said “Sorry I cant accept tips but if you like send it to the SGVTA as a donation”

So I did. I called the city of Monrovia and asked how much they were paying this bus service and they told me not 1 penny they are all volunteers and they work for these old people free of charge I was blown away.

So if they have a police department to keep my father safe who cares. And if they gave that millionaire asshole a badge by mistake so what. They got rid of him when they found out I was told by the city. Police departments catch bad cops all the time so big deal they gave him a badge by mistake.

I found out from the city this guy that owns the body shop has taken the money out of his own business and his own pocket to help these people that our government wont help. Now since this car blowing up and all the negative publicity it has brought, its putting a strain on them and they are thinking about stopping the service. Now what does my dad do when he needs to go to the doctor call a bloger or the press? I don’t think so. I am all for freedom of speech but until you know what your talking about and how it will impact others keep your stupid opinion to yourself.

I like the part of "...and how it will impact others keep your stupid opinion to yourself." Wow. So the ends always justify the means? That is the same excuse the defenders of Mussolini used to excuse his record on running Italy in WWII. "He may have led us into a war, ruined our country, and killed thousands of people. But he got the trains to run on time."

Hey... it is my blog. I will ask all the questions I want. Sorry about your dad. But it doesn't excuse the abuse of power we have seen in this case.

You Can Still Salvage The SGVTA
From my perspective, the only way you can salvage your agency, and in fact make it stronger, is to publicly abandon the agency's police department and instead focus 100% of the agency on what benefits it brings to the citizens of the SGV. Just because you CAN create a police agency doesn't mean you have to. You started a good thing there. Don't blow it by clinging to the police department. That has tainted the rest of the agency and needs to amputated.

So for sake people who have come to rely on the SGVTA, such as the father of the comment poster, please do this. You can still come clean and make this work for you. You can use this to appeal to sponsors. But you have to have a squeeky clean image to do this.

Eriksson's Snake Oil
I want to take a moment to delve into the product that Eriksson was promising the SGVTA. To quote you "Mr. Eriksson offered to donate time and equipment to develop a real-time camera monitoring system utilizing CDMA technology designed specifically for SGVTA's fleet. Mr. Eriksson proposed using SGVTA buses to test what could have revolutionized transit security on SGVTA's relatively small transit system."

I've noticed that he didn't mention more about what Eriksson was promising. I've read in other places where the product was going to be real-time face recognition system, which is much, much more than a glorified video survelence system as indicated here.

The words "real-time camera monitoring system utilizing CDMA technology" is just another way of saying "cell-phone camera". There is nothing revolutionary about that. You can buy this technology at Circut City and Radio Shack now. The cell phone camera takes a picture and sends it to a user, just like any teenager can do.

Cabs already use systems like this. The have a digital video camera that take the photo of passengers. They might even already transmit the image to the dispatcher in case something terrible happens to the driver and cab.

But... face recognition technology. That would be revolutionary. The problem is, the state of the art of face recognition system is a long way from being reliable. And certainly not reliable as a real time application. It is usless to worry about the mobile client parts of such a system if it can't do the job with input given to it from a hard disk. Talk about putting the cart before the horse!

The skills and technology needed to program a video game are vastly different from the skills needed to program a system that can make sense of an image. To do that, you have to interpret an image that you have no control of the input variables. When you program the game, you have control over all variables and what image is presented on the screen. They are different s night and day.

So my question is... Did Eriksson ever demonstrate a working face recognition system that functioned at all, no matter the source of the input image?